Stress and Overeating

Many of our clients tell us how they struggle with overeating. They get upset and blame themselves for it but they often lack understanding for how stress makes it very difficult for them to change this.

About two-thirds of us will overeat when we are stressed. Part of the reason we do this is psychological. Many of us put considerable effort into monitoring our food intake such that once our systems are taxed with extra stress, we have less energy to accord to this task. During times of stress, willpower almost always goes out the window and this is why a restrictive relationship with food can be so problematic.

Another way stress causes us to overeat is because our brain secretes glucocorticoids with the onset of stress. Glucocorticoids have the effect of increasing appetite such that you will be motivated to replace all the energy you depleted during the stressor. Once glucocorticoids are released, they stay in our system for awhile, so for any given stressor there will be a period of increased appetite.

If stress is chronic for you – horrible boss, traffic every day, juggling the demands of work and home, ailing parents, unstable relationship… you will have bursts of these intermittent stressors all day and secreting glucocorticoids each time.

Here comes the bad news. As appetite increases, we tend to gravitate toward the foods that are high in energy (breads, sugars) and we can end up with more abdominal fat. You have probably already heard that abdominal fat is the worst kind. It releases inflammatory signals which increases inflammation throughout the body (most dangerously in the heart) and it pulls the spine forward. Stress causes abdominal fat which in turn puts more stress on your body.

Under stress, our heart rate and blood pressure will go up to send blood to the areas it is most needed – the thighs and the lungs for example. Meanwhile, our brains will divert blood away from the areas that need it less in a crisis such as your gut and reproductive organs. Under chronic stress, the digestive system gets shut off repeatedly and you end up with functional bowel disorders such as irritable bowel syndrome or spastic colon.

Stress is a nasty bugger. It is why we write about it so much on our blog. Becoming aware of how much stress costs us can be the inspiration to do something about it. We hope you will find some of our earlier blog posts on stress helpful in your efforts to better manage stress in your life here, here and here .

If you need help to get a handle on your stress, you can reach us at 514 223 5327.

Written by Shawna Atkins, Ph.D., Psychologist

Winter Blues

The holiday season can be a source of joy for many but some of us feel worse during this time of year. Family get togethers may never have been a source of replenishment, and the obligation to maintain and increase our contact with difficult family members can exacerbate an anguish we already feel. Add to this the increase in stress that comes from the cold weather, traffic, and crowds, all of which conspire to have us feeling more blah than joy.

Stress accumulates in a compounding manner that has lingering effects. This is why adding regular stress reduction to your routine can be so helpful. However, many of us get swept up in daily pressures and stress reduction drops to the bottom of our priority list. If you are feeling fatigued, irritable or wound up – these are all cues that you need more relaxation in your life. Relaxation is the opposite of stress and you need it every day. Make time for quiet, for play, and to just be.

For those who feel more down in the winter, you will need to add more to your stress reduction routine.

1) Try to get as much natural sunlight as possible. Even a brief walk during lunch can be beneficial.
2) Stand up and stretch and walk around for a few minutes. Any kind of regular physical activity will help. You will find that it is easier to maintain if it is an activity you enjoy.
3) Eat regularly and make sure you are getting protein and carb combinations that help you to sustain energy.

If these ideas improve how you feel, then this may be all you need. However, the blues become more serious if you can’t sleep, are haunted by negative thoughts, feel tired and listless all the time, have trouble concentrating, and feel that your life is hopeless while you are helpless to change it. This is when you know the “blues” have slipped into depression and you need to get professional help. A therapist can help you to identify what might be causing your depression and help you to live a more fulfilling life. You can reach us here or at 514 223 5327.

Whether you have the blahs, the blues, or winter depression, we hope these ideas help you to find your way to a season of joy, rest and renewal.

Written by Shawna Atkins, Ph.D., Psychologist

Supporting a Loved One through Their Depression: Part II

Last week, we looked at some of the myths surrounding depression and a few of the ways depression can have an impact on people who have loved ones who might be struggling. So how can we support someone we love who is suffering from depression?

1-The first step is to take better care of yourself. If you are struggling, then it can be impossible to support someone else who is also struggling. I often use the example of using an oxygen mask on an airplane in the case of an emergency: If you are unable to breathe, how can you possibly help the other person? We must take care of ourselves first in order to be a strong and healthy ally for the person struggling with depression.

2- Recognizing that it is NOT your fault that the person you are caring for is feeling depressed. Finding a way to let go of the idea that you had any responsibility in causing your loved one’s depression is crucial in your own self-care and in being more present in caring for your loved one.

3- Reminding yourself that the person who is suffering needs to work it out for themselves. Although you can be their ally and support, it is ultimately their responsibility to get the help that they need.

4- Educating yourself about depression and mental illness can be very empowering and helpful. The more you can understand depression, it’s signs, myths and its treatments, the stronger you can be in supporting your loved one.

5- Get support for yourself. It is very important that you have an outlet for your own challenges, emotions, thoughts and fears as you are going through the challenging experience with your loved one. Different forms of support could include keeping a journal, joining a support group, talking to other family members or friends about your experiences and seeking therapy for yourself.

6- Setting aside time for yourself at least once a week in order to recharge your batteries and to do something that is important for YOU. It may seem strange to suggest time alone and away from your loved one but this is necessary in order to feel rejuvenated and to be able to tackle the rest of the week with more strength.

7- Preserving routines and comfort rituals can be very nurturing for both the person of support and the person struggling with depression. One example of this is maintaining hobbies such as baking, regular exercise, painting. The presence of routine can be very stabilizing in the midst of emotional turmoil.

8- Maintaining your friendships and having fun. This may sound simple or might elicit feelings of guilt or discomfort at the idea of having fun when your loved one is suffering. However, we all need to have balance and an outlet to better manage life’s challenges. There is a tendency for those supporting others through their depression to also withdraw which actually puts them at risk for depression themselves. Therefore, spending time with friends and having some joy in your life can have a positive impact on your ability to support your loved one.

9-Remembering that change is always occurring and that regardless of how painful your current experience might feel it is temporary. The idea that “this too shall pass” and we are all a part of a much bigger world that is in constant motion can be helpful in shifting our perspective from the present suffering.

10- Finally, the practice of “letting go” is probably the hardest step but the most powerful one that you can begin to practice. Whether through mindfulness practice, through prayer, nurturing rituals, relaxation exercises or cognitive strategies – whatever method helps you to slow down and let go of what you cannot control can be a liberating and humbling process.

Your loved one might experience fear of being abandoned, feeling “bad” or “not good enough”, and repeatedly needing assurances that you are not going to leave them in the midst of their pain and suffering. Therefore, letting your loved one know that you are in this with them and will get through this difficult experience together can be very healing. Sometimes, there is nothing to actually “do” besides being present and empathic with the person. This can mean telling your loved one that although you are not feeling the same things that they are, that you are here with them as they go through it. Being available, understanding, supportive, caring, and present, you are doing a lot more to help your loved one than it might seem in the moment. Shifting your stance from “doing” to “being” can have great impact on your loved one’s recovery. This is why your own self-care becomes necessary so that you can “be” well, and it will help you to avoid burning out or becoming resentful. This is particularly important if you have other family members that also require your attention. Encouraging your loved one to seek out support is another way that you can be an ally in their recovery. Whether through therapy, medication, regular exercise or talking to a physician – letting your loved one know that resources are available can mean the first step toward recovery of their depression and their life.

If you need assistance in supporting your loved one or if you are suffering from depression yourself, you can schedule an appointment to meet one of our clinicians by calling us at (514) 223-5327.

Written by Marianne Chivi, M.A., c.o.

Supporting a Loved One through Depression

Depression is certainly poignant for the person experiencing it but we often overlook its impact on caregivers. It can be a very challenging and heartbreaking experience to witness somebody close to you struggle and to not know how to help. In this blog post, we will provide a general overview of the signs of depression, the myths that interfere with effective support and the impact it often has on a person’s loved ones. Next week (Supporting a Loved One through Depression: Part II), we will look at how you can effectively support a loved one to cope with and recover from their depression.

Depression can look different for different individuals. For example, it can appear as overall pessimism, anger, sadness, anxiety, fatigue or even in the form of an addiction. Symptoms may include: persistent feelings of hopelessness/sadness/emptiness/worthlessness, a general loss of interest in things, withdrawing from friends and family/social isolation, fatigue, change in sleep patterns, change in appetite, self-medication and suicidal thoughts. However, not everyone will experience all of those symptoms simultaneously or some people may experience varying degrees or frequency of symptoms at different times during a depressive episode. Before we look at some ways of supporting a loved one through their depression, it is important to highlight some myths of depression that can interfere with our ability to provide the appropriate support:

1-“It is all in your head”. Depression can be a symptom of other medical illnesses or it can have biological causes. Even when it presents as a chronic condition that has no clear cause, it always creates biological changes to the brain that can be extremely difficult to change.

2- The belief that if they were controlling/managing their negative thoughts such as “I’m lazy”, “I’m stupid”, “I’m a failure”, or “I’m hopeless”, that they can feel better. The fact is that when someone is in the dark hole of a depression it can feel almost impossible to control the recurring negative thoughts which come into a person’s mind. The effects of depression on the brain is such that it increases the likelihood that you will repeat the same behaviors that will make your depression worse.

3- With enough “will power”, they can overcome their depression. Statements such as simply “snapping out of it” or “trying harder” can in fact cause more harm than good. One way to think about such comments is to replace depression with a physical illness such as liver disease, for example: “If you had stronger will power, you can make your liver function better”. We wouldn’t suggest that to a person suffering from a physical illness so we certainly can’t suggest that to someone suffering from depression.

4- That depression or other mental illnesses occur because a person is “weak” or “crazy”. This belief can lead to feelings of shame which can lead to further isolation. The stigma surrounding mental illness is very discouraging which can exacerbate the person’s condition further.

5- “If a person is depressed then they cannot be productive”. This statement is simply untrue. Many people who are feeling depressed lead functional productive lives but suffer in silence.

It is common for people close to a person with depression to personalize their loved one’s suffering as though it were a reflection of them failing in some way. Feelings of rejection, helplessness, fear, anxiety, worry, being overwhelmed and guilt are commonly reported. Some people may find themselves questioning if they were “bad” parents, partners, friends, sisters/brothers, which contributed in some way to their loved one becoming depressed. Another impact within a relationship with someone who is depressed might be a loss of emotional and/or physical intimacy, feeling neglected, communication changes, and an overall sense of uncertainty regarding when their partner will recover or relapse into another depressive episode again. Feelings of being trapped or perhaps anger/resentment at the shift in the course of your lives as a couple may also surface. If the depression is long-standing or chronic, a caregiver may begin to experience burnout or become depressed themselves. Some signs of burnout include feeling burdened, as though you have reached your own limits in your ability to cope, insomnia, headaches/migraines, irritability or anger, stomach upset, frequent colds/illnesses, heart palpitations, backaches, sadness, emptiness and decrease in efficiency.

Next week we will look at steps that you can take to better support a loved one who is depressed. In the meantime, if you or a loved one are experiencing depression or are struggling in supporting someone through a depression, we can help you. You can reach out to us at (514) 223-5327.

Written by Marianne Chivi, M.A., c.o.

Stop Sex Addiction

Many of my clients ask me if sex addiction is real and this comes as no surprise given that deliberation exists among the clinicians who treat it. Arguably, we can ask if a host of other mental health issues are ‘real’. For example, in some cultures something like a manic episode can be seen as spiritual enlightenment. This being said, the number of celebrities who have come out as ‘sex addicts’ after being caught cheating has led many people to question whether sex addiction is simply an excuse for bad behavior. Wherever you stand on the issue, there are people who find themselves participating in sexual activities that they feel real distress about. Their behavior is getting in the way of their relationships, work, responsibilities and overall functioning.

People who identify as sex addicts use sex as a way to cope with life. Put differently, they are self-medicating emotional discomfort. However soothing and distracting this discomfort can be in the moment, using sex as a way of coping can create a vicious cycle. Picture this: a person feels distress and uses sex in an attempt to feel better but the relief is temporary and they eventually feel worse. There comes an even greater sense of emotional discomfort and shame so the person has an even greater need for an escape from uncomfortable feelings. And so the cycle continues. Similar to those who abuse substances and alcohol, sex addicts overuse sex as a way to deal with distress; mental health issues, work stress, relationship stress, etc. I say ‘overuse’ because sexual activity can indeed be a healthy coping mechanism, however problems can arise if that is the only way one relieves stress. As is the case with most things in life balance is key; we need to have a variety of coping skills in our toolbox.

Sex therapy can help clients learn to tolerate distress and to choose healthier ways of coping. Here are a few things you can expect if you decide to seek help:

Learn to identify your triggers of distress that compel you to seek sex as a way to self-soothe. What are you trying to escape from? Recognize the triggers and learn ways to manage these triggers better.

Learn about healthy coping. This can include things like relaxation, meditation, making use of social support, improving communication, grounding techniques, body awareness, exercise, journaling, etc.

Focus on intimacy in your relationship(s). Often sex addicts report a history of difficulty with emotional vulnerability; intimacy is perceived as risky and stressful. You can learn to increase your comfort level for emotional closeness and learn ways to express your needs to your partner(s).

Learn ways to challenge the negative thinking that influences your mood. Negative thoughts often lead to poor mood. By identifying and changing unhelpful thoughts, you may notice improvements in how you feel. Feeling better can lead to making healthier choices in life.

These are just a few of the ways that pursuing counseling can help you to deal with sex addiction. People often feel ashamed and alone and keep their struggle with sex addiction hidden. We can help you feel less overwhelmed and make the changes you need to make. You can find us at www.wellnessinmind.ca or at 514 223 5327.

Written by Andrea Guschlbauer, PhD.

Bad News Stress

What is this world coming to? When will the shootings end? If you are feeling stressed out with what has been on the news lately, you are not alone. In a recent survey in the US, 1 in 4 people reported a “great deal” of stress in the previous month and they identified the biggest contributor of this stress to watching, reading or listening to the news. Whether it is shootings, natural tragedies, terrorist attacks, racial unrest, or politics – there is so much bad news. And as media companies compete with each other for your viewership, they use sensationalism to grab your attention. Traumatic events covered in a sensational way heighten our emotional responses and exacerbate stress. Recently a group of researchers studied the reactions to the Boston Marathon bombing of 4500 people across the US. They found that people who consumed 6 or more hours of media coverage per day reported a more acute stress response than those people that were actually present at the time of the bombing. Add to this the conflictual opinions coming from friends and family on social media about these hot topics, and the tension intensifies.

What to do? While you have little control over what the media conglomerates present to you, you do have control over how it affects you. Here are some ways to mitigate the impact:

Reduce overall consumption: For those of you who listen to, read or watch a lot of news, you have probably already noticed how repetitive it is. Experiment with reducing the amount of time you spend consuming the news.

Change the source: Given that the images on the television can be so unsettling, you might consider to listen to the news on the radio instead to reduce your exposure.

Choose the timing: Consider holding off getting informed about world events until after your day is done to prevent bringing the negativity of the news to the important events of your day. Alternatively, you might decide that the morning is better than the 11 o’clock news so that you are not going to sleep with those unsettling images in your mind.

Practice random acts of kindness: Offer smiles and hugs to people in need, buy a coffee for a stranger, send a thank you note, volunteer… the possibilities are endless. Invest time in these positive exchanges between you and others and your body will repay you with hormones that increase your physical and emotional wellbeing. These acts of kindness have been shown to increase our happiness as much, if not more than the person they are shared with. Additionally, by contributing in some way to make the world a better place, we reduce our feelings of powerlessness.

Surround yourself with beauty: Intentionally seek out and surround yourself with the things that tend to lift your spirit. This may be nature, music, specific activities. It might be helpful to list these for yourself to use as a pick-me-up when you are feeling drained.

All of this is easier said than done because of the innate negativity bias of our brains. While our ability to survive as a species is due to our ability to notice danger quickly and to allocate more headspace to attending to any threats in our environment, the downside is more stress and less happiness. Researchers have carefully examined what buffers the effects of negativity on our lives and they discovered that frequent small positive acts at a ratio of about 5 to 1 is how we find balance. A great vacation might be really nice, but it is the frequency of small positive exchanges between you and others that will tip the scale toward wellness. As you strive to reduce your consumption of the news, increase acts of kindness and exposure to beauty to find your balance. Challenge yourself to create 5 positive experience for every negative one you encounter.

We hope these ideas contribute to you being as well as can be in this life. If you are struggling at all, we are here to help. You can reach us at 514 223 5327.
Written by: Shawna Atkins, Ph.D.

Learn to lust again: Reviving sex-drive for women

Many women experience a decrease in or absence of sexual desire at some point in their lives. The reasons why are vast and complex. Aside from possible physical causes, contributors can include socialization, sex drive differences, balancing multiple roles and psychological causes. Women are raised to focus on being desirable rather than on their own desire. In many cultures, women are encouraged to prioritize their physical appearance so as to be attractive to potential mates. It is far less common for women to be taught to tune into their sexual desire; women are often labeled as “sluts” if they veer too far from expected gender norms around sexuality and sexual expression. Another possible contributor to decreased sexual desire is being in a relationship with a partner whose sex drive is higher. There is debate around whether men have higher sex drives than women (in different-sex relationships). However, regardless of who wants sex more, men might initiate more often, leaving little room for women to tune into and explore their desire. For example, if your partner is constantly hounding you for sex, you probably don’t get the chance to have your own desire build up and expressed. Women are also likely to feel drained by their everyday responsibilities; balancing their relationship(s), career, children, hobbies, etc. Oftentimes women’s’ plates are so full that there is no room for sexual desire. We can also imagine that if a woman is having a tough time emotionally, sex may fall to the bottom of the priority list. Depression, anxiety, stress and past sexual trauma can all get in the way of sexual desire.

Women can regain or heighten sexual desire, especially if they can identify the cause(s). Sometimes making small changes in everyday life has a direct impact on desire. For example, decreasing the use of substances (cigarettes, drugs and alcohol), prioritizing and scheduling time for intimacy, focusing on fitness and working on improving communication within the couple.

Here are a few things to consider in an effort to increase sexual desire:

Reconnect with your body: When women experience low desire, they can develop negative thoughts and feelings about their bodies. For example, they have thoughts such as – I am fat, my breasts are too small, my thighs shouldn’t touch, etc. If you feel poorly about your body, chances are you are not motivated to share it with your partner. You might try examining your body in a non-sexual way; stand in front of a mirror and simply observe. You want to look at yourself without feeling stressed or anxious and practice not judging. When critical thoughts arise, bring yourself back to simply observing. The idea is that you want to move away from negative thoughts and feelings to a neutral, eventually positive stance. When you feel good about your body, you are more likely to feel desirable, aroused and want to engage sexually.

Communicate with your partner: Low sexual desire can cause tension in relationships. Keeping what you’re going through to yourself can create a wall between you and your partner(s) and lead to misunderstandings and conflict. One can imagine that conflict can lead to an even further decrease in desire. Choosing to communicate openly and honestly about your low desire can lead to a sense of emotional closeness, which can transfer to an increased desire for sexual intimacy. Emotional closeness can also move the focus from sex to nurturing other aspects of the relationships (e.g., recreational intimacy, physical intimacy, spiritual intimacy and intellectual intimacy), enriching and strengthening the relationship overall.

Challenge negative thinking: Sometimes women experiencing low desire fall into a trap of unhelpful thoughts (e.g., I’m not in the mood so I can’t be intimate, I must be unattractive to my partner when I’m so stressed out). By learning to think more positively, women might notice improvements in self-esteem and arousal. A key component of good sex is a positive state of mind; if you feel good about yourself and sex brings about positive thoughts, then you’re more likely to want to have it!

Incorporate touching: Often when women are struggling with desire they cease all forms of intimacy, including physical touch. Touching your partner and being touched can bring about a sense of closeness during challenging times. It also allows your brain to re-connect with touch in a positive way. You’re reminded that not all touch has to be sexual, thus decreasing all-or-nothing thinking. Sometimes holding hands or hugging can feel as intimate as intercourse. Getting used to touching again can eventually lead to increased arousal and increased comfort with sexual touching.

Add couple time to your calendar: Too often couples forget to prioritize their relationship. By scheduling quality time together, you are giving your relationship the opportunities it needs to flourish. Do something enjoyable together; try a new activity or simply decide to have breakfast together. By spending time together, you will increase your chances of feeling close to one another. You can even schedule time for sex, which allows you to get into a proper state of mind (think- happy, sexy thoughts instead of being caught off guard in the middle of feeling stressed out or tired).

Get creative: If you and your partner have fallen into the same old sexual routine, consider changing things up. Have sex in a different room than usual, go to a sex shop together, watch erotica, talk about things you have always wanted to try, share fantasies. Sometimes novelty can re-ignite feelings of desire.

Try mindfulness: In short, make an effort to be present in the moment, nonjudgmentally. This can start with simple moments of physical affection: really look at your partner, take in each other’s smell, touch each other’s skin and hair, taste each other’s lips. Let any negative thoughts pass through you and refocus on experiencing your partner and the intimate moment. You can also do this while having sex; see our blog on enhancing sex with mindfulness.

Low desire can be a challenge but it can also be an opportunity to work on improving how you feel about yourself as well as a chance to reconnect with your partner(s) and strengthen your relationship(s). If you recognize that you are struggling with desire and would like to further explore ways to improve arousal, give us a call at 514-223-5327 and we will be pleased to assist you.

Written by Andrea Guschlbauer, PhD.

Exercise and your Brain

Most of us have heard about the physical, long-term health benefits of exercise, but we may be less aware of its neurological, cognitive and mental health benefits. Exercise can have a very powerful impact on learning problems, stress, anxiety, depression, attention disorders, addiction, hormonal changes, and aging.

Exercise stimulates the brain to produce brain-derived neurotropic factors or what neuroscientists call BDNF. BDNF has increasingly been referred to as “miracle gro” for the brain because of its importance for the metabolism, the way it increases antioxidant production and because it actually promotes the growth of new brain cells. It also facilitates the production of serotonin, the neurotransmitter vital for learning and for the prevention of depression.

A few studies have attested that exercise is as effective or better than antidepressant medication in reducing the symptoms of major depression. Exercise has also been found to lessen the impact of ADHD on leaning performance, to prevent cognitive decline in aging, to reduce cortisol levels (the stress hormone) and consequently to reduce anxiety.

As long as it is not too strenuous, exercise fortifies the structure of the nerve cells against damage and disease. This being said, several researchers have found that interval training in which you bring your heart rate up high for a short periods of time and then bring it down for longer periods between four and six times per week is ideal.

Check with your general practitioner before you begin a high-intensity exercise program. If there are no concerns, then gradually build up your exercise program as an investment in your health. Physical activity is a natural way to prevent the negative consequences of stress.

We wish you well in your endeavor to incorporate physical activity into your wellness plan. If you or anyone you know need help getting motivated, we would be happy to help. You can reach us at 514 223 5327.

Written by: Shawna Atkins, Ph.D., OPQ

Oculocardiac Reflex

Recently I learned about the oculocardiac reflex in the eyes that can serve as a very powerful doorway to the relaxation response. This reflex is regulated by twelve muscles (six in each eye) that hold the eyeball in place called the extraocular muscles. These twelve muscles are crucial not only to our ability to focus our vision but they are also essential for our survival since the evolution of our species has depended upon our eyes to detect danger. The extraocular eye muscles contain nerve endings that are the source of the oculocardiac reflex (OCR), a very powerful parasympathetic body reflex. The OCR directly affects the vagus nerve which runs from the brain directly down the spinal cord to the heart and the stomach. When activated, the OCR communicates to the vagus nerve that we are not in danger thus initiating an immediate signal to slow down heart rate, lower blood pressure and relax the body.

I have always wondered why the eye pillow in yoga felt so good. I discovered it during a yoga nidra class I was taking and I have since incorporated it into the savasana of my regular practice because I liked it so much. I also keep an eye pillow next to my bed for those times when I have difficulty sleeping and it works like a charm.

If you have been diagnosed with low blood pressure, bradychardia (a reduced heart rate), or a cardiac arrhythmia (an irregular heart rate), please consult with your physician before trying this. If these are not concerns for you, I invite you to try this to activate your OCR and help you deepen your relaxation. Lightly cover your eyes with the palms of your hands, experiment with the pressure to find what feels right for you. Alternatively, you can invest in an eye pillow for about $10. I encourage you to sustain this for 10 to 15 minutes to allow it enough time to work its magic. You can also deepen the response by lying down and by combining it with diaphragmatic breathing.

Any of you who suffer from anxiety will undoubtedly find this helpful. There have been a few studies that have shown the OCR reflex to be an effective strategy to reduce anxiety and eliminate panic attacks.

May this idea serve you well in your pursuit to manage stress in your life. If you or anyone you know need support, give us a call at 514 223 5327.

Written by: Shawna Atkins, Ph.D.

How to Breathe

I often ask my clients if anyone has ever taught them how to breathe and more often than not I learn that they have not had this essential life instruction. If you were fortunate enough to have had voice or wind instrument training or if you are an athlete, you likely learned how to breathe with your diaphragm to improve your performance. Most of us breathe from our chest however and in doing so we unknowingly trigger the stress response.

Our brains and bodies need a lot of oxygen to function effectively. Practicing diaphragmatic breathing teaches our body to take fewer deeper breaths to improve the oxygenation of our lungs, heart and brain. Breathing more slowly and deeply also initiates the parasympathetic nervous system which invites a relaxation response in the body. And finally, exhaling completely evacuates more carbon dioxide, which reduces the stress hormone called cortisol.

Here is how to do it:

Put one hand on your belly and the other on your chest. Notice which hand is moving the most when you breathe.

Count the number of times you breathe in and out by watching the second hand for one minute. Fifteen to 25 is too many, 12 to 15 is average and four to eight is the window you will aim for in a relaxation response. Make a note of your baseline breath rate.

Keeping one hand on your chest and the other on your belly, breathe in and allow the air to expand your diaphragm while keeping the hand on your chest relatively still. When full, hold your muscles slightly before you exhale.

Now exhale, pushing the hand on your diaphragm inward until all the air is out of your lungs. If you can still talk then there is still air in there and you need to exhale more. Again, pause, hold your muscles slightly before you begin to inhale.

Try practicing diaphragmatic breathing for 10 or 15 minutes a day during daylight hours. See if you can bring the number of breaths you take in a minute down to the optimal level of four to eight. Try using stickers as reminders to encourage your practice in strategic places such as at your desk, your bathroom mirror, your car…

Diaphragmatic breathing can be especially helpful for health problems such as hypertension, asthma, heart disease, anxiety, panic disorder, depression, sleep problems, chronic pain, circulatory problems, substance abuse, learning problems and anger management.

If you or anyone you know need help managing stress, give us a call, we are here to help.

Written by: Shawna Atkins, Ph.D.